All good things...

…come to a start.

Hey everybody. It seems like everyone out there has one of these blogs and I guess they’re kinda cool so I thought I’d jump on the wagon, so to speak. I don’t really know what I want to do with this blog. It seems like everyone has a theme that makes their blog cool (that’s such a weird word, blog. Blog blog blog bloggety blog blog. It loses its meaning if you keep saying it. Like “feet” or “Jew”. It kinda sounds like something my slutty friend J would brag that one of the girls he keeps claiming he taps would do to him. "Blog", that is. Not "Jew". As in, “I went out with this sho’ty last night and she totally blogged me.” He wouldn’t let a girl Jew him. He’s a good Christian. Anyways… ) I figure I’ll just keep talking about me and what’s going on in my life, or un-life as it were, and hope that I’m interesting enough for all y’all (hopety hope). So, without further ado, this is me and my so called un-life.

I guess I should start out with introductions. My name is Scott. I’m 15 years old, live in New Orleans and am a sophomore at TE Lawrence High School (go Sand Monkeys!). I’m a pretty good student with a 3.8 GPA and I want to be a writer when I grow up (English is my favorite subject). I especially like the works of Tennyson, Poe, Jesus and William Shatner (seriously…Tek War RULES!). I know what you’re thinking. “If he’s from New Orleans, shouldn’t he be all into Anne Rice and shit?” To which I say “Go eat a bag of dicks!” Anne Rice can suck the dangling participles out of my ass hole. I hate her!

Now that I got that out of the way, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m a pretty normal kid. I like the things that most kids like, like music and hanging out with my friends (that's a lot of "likes". I need to work on my redundancy. Likety like like like. That's another word that gets weird, like "onomatapoea" or "women's sufferage"). Oh! I forgot to mention. I LOVE to sing. I’m in jazz choir at school. I know that sounds kinda gay but you wouldn’t believe the amount of hotties I get to throw game at because of my voice. In a couple of years, if it’s still around, I’m going to audition for American Idol. I think I have what it takes to make it, at least into the top 20. I’ll keep you informed if I’m still writing this blog (“Seriously…she totally broke out the vegemite and blogged me in the middle of the auditorium. I was like, ‘this is blogged up.’”)

Heh heh.

I suppose the only other thing I need to tell you is that I’m a zombie. Well, “Undead-American” as my guidance councilor, Mr. Swipse (pronounced “Sweep See” but he asks us to call him Johnson, which is weird because I think his real first name is Charles) prefers to call me. He keeps telling me that the term zombie is “lifeist” (whatever that means), and that I shouldn’t perpetuate a stereotype by “giving credence to a hideous epithet”, which is stupid. That’s what I am. I’m a fucking zombie. Get over it, “Johnson”.

Or maybe I should call you “Dickhead-American” so as not to perpetuate the stereotype that you’re anything but a stupid dickhead.

Dickhead.

Anyway. That’s my first blog contribution (“…and after she was done, she totally swallowed my blog contribution…if you know what I mean” J’s such a slut). Not too bad. I can’t wait to see where this goes.

Until next time.

Merrrrghhhhhhh…